Birds  … they are everywhere you look , they flutter about  , they preen  and fluff themselves up , get ticked off if you mess up their  nests , they protect themselves like  anything  and you better look out you do not get in the way . There is nothing more noisy and fluttery than a messed up bird  so watch out  you are not the 1 who messes them up , make sure to give them plenty of distance . Birds can be  very , very pretty  or very , very ugly , they  can be  noisy or they can be quiet , some you don’t even notice  unless you accidently come across them when in your travels , usually these nice quiet ones are the ones that don’t look so flighty and have way more personality .Whatever you do, do not under any circumstance mess with their mates or you will open up a whole new world of pain , more than you can imagine .

Some of these birds have the most wonderful looking nests while others have a very plain and very functional  nest , each type of bird has what it needs to get on and it protects it and itself  very fiercely  so again keep out of the way if you want to stay in 1 piece . The way these birds dress up their nests says a lot about them , if the nest is all pretty and full of flouncy bits and bobs usually they are themselves like that will all the colour  they can put on themselves and the places they live and also the places they go to are the same .Go into a plain birds nest and all you will see just what is absolutely needed and nothing more  , no extra cover nothing extra pretty just what is needed   to do whatever it is they need to do .Also with these ones do not mess with their mates or it will be the same , a lot of pain .

These  birds also differ in how they treat family  and friends , the bright , flouncy , loud ones are always  found in places  that are like that too and they all flock to the same places to have meetings and share food and drink etc. Whereas the plain birds tend to be much quieter and will not gather as much and surely not in the loud , noisy, colourful places of the others . They do seem however to be able to accomplish the same things just not with so much noise and brightness    they just settle down , communicate and get on with things no mess , no fuss, no nothing  and  Bobs your uncle all sorted . They also have a really good family connection too , so again do not mess with it if you value your own life .

Looking at birds makes you wonder who ever looked at a woman 1 day and decided she looked like a bird  ? What ? You thought  I was talking about the feathered variety  ? lol  now where did  I say that ? Thinking on it  though lol there are so many similarities  between the 2 species I can almost see how someone  decided they were the same , lol the  human kind of bird can be equally  as noisy , colorful , full of flight as our lovely feathered ones , they too can be just as protective of  themselves and all around  them  so yes easy to make the comparison  and  I bet a few people would like to be able to put some of them in a cage to keep them out of the way …lol…Polly want a cracker  ?? I am sure at times  the feathered variety are way more nice than the others  .

Getting back now to the main question , who gave women that name , and how did it take on so well ? So well that women are called birds in a lot of countries now , sometimes in  fun sometimes not , but where did it all start ? I mean really you looked  at a few women and then you say , hmmmm looks like a bird , sounds like a bird , so it must be a bird ?  Looked at the way they behave , dress, feed , drink and said yep must be a bird  , lol got me wondering , yes  i know there are a lot of similarities but really  ? Yes birds come in all shapes and sizes , all colours and personalities , both feathered  and the other variety  but still  really ? Birds  ? I give up lol  sometimes I do prefer the feathered variety  they are so much nicer and seem to care more about their own than the so called human kind ….give me them anytime  they are much easier to get on with …I will always wonder where it all started  but oh well  …lol  you get that  ..

Men are like medicine, they come with side effects….

I’ll never find anyone else like you,thank goodness for that!!!

This entry was posted on October 19, 2016. 1 Comment

Less is More

Less is more   and it is amazing  how many times this proves to be the case , we don’t realise it at the time we are getting all this stuff together  that we feel we really  ” must ”  have . We  must have the best of the best , we must have the latest  edition of whatever it is we are chasing at the moment , it must have all the bells and whistles  it must  be the exact thing  or we don’t  want it . The more we allow ourselves to be like  this the more the big companies love  it as it puts more and more money in their  pockets  and that is what they  want more than anything else.

What they do not want us to learn is that we do not need everything to be updated continually , they do not need to be renewed  what seems to be every  5 mins. Listen  to them and they will have you spending  more and more money  to keep a level of upgrade  going  that they want you to do. They do not want you to realise that the new phone  you got , the new computer you had , the  new kitchen appliance or the new  TV  , will actually last more than 5 mins.  you really do not have to keep getting the new model or else . They hate it when you do find out that …hey wait a min. here   these things are still working fine so why do I need to get rid of a perfectly working product ?

When you look at it too a lot of the things they tell us we  ” must ” have we really do not even need , I mean  ok you have a TV it works good but you can’t do all these extra bits they  say it now needs to do , they now have so many additives  that they are hardly like a normal TV anymore , but if we do not  want it to be any more than a  TV  why do we need to get rid of it just to have the newest thing  ? There is also computers, they are forever making them bigger and better  , just like the  TV’s , then talk you into needing  the upgrades , they make it sound like it’s life or death if you don’t upgrade the very min. they say you should . The worst of all these devices is  the mobile phone , it seems there is something bigger and better for them every 2 mins  rather than 5 , it is just amazing  and what is more amazing  is that people cannot seem to wait t get the so called improved gadget and they line up for days sometimes to get them .

Me personally I couldn’t  care less about all these so called upgrades as long as it does what I bought it for in the 1st place then I don’t want to be  spending money for the sake of it  just because some big wig  millionaire  who owns a big store  says  I need to . These days it is just about everything  we use they have now made upgradeable , to phones , to TV’s, to  fridges , to washing machines , doesn’t matter what ,now it seems everything  must be upgraded  or else. Then there is the motor car , man have they changed over the years  now they can even drive themselves  ….good grief …no thanks that is 1 thing I  do not like   but yes now they can . Give me  the cars  we had  before they started playing about and putting computers in them  , that to me was the time they got worse not better , if they broke down then it was usually a simple and cheap thing to fix it , but now it’s next to impossible  to fix them yourself or cheaply even if  you can find the parts  you need .

The old IT concept of ” turning it off then  on again ” these days has meaning for so many things that are not computers at all but have computers  in them  making them more and more expensive to fix and to run. Seems they can computerise anything these days  , hate to  say it but that also includes  people * shudder * The troubling  thing is we sit back and let it happen and say nothing  , we let them do what they want to  and they love it . As for me all I want is a phone that makes  calls,  a fridge that keeps my food cold, a freezer that freezes , a TV that  is  just a  Tv  and a car that is just a car that you can run without needing  to be a computer tech  to be able to run it , a stove that cooks the food , used to love the old wood burning stoves they were great to cook on  but now  we must protect  the trees  you can’t go and cut them down …..sheeesh … I give up  …it does not compute….it does not compute ….it does not compute ..


HUSBAND:Why don’t we ever see eye to eye?, ME:because you are taller than me…


This entry was posted on October 11, 2016. 1 Comment

We Should Have Come With Zips

We should have come with zips …fair dinkum the amount of times we or someone we know has to have an operation , and you know what that means  , the docs get their trusty little scalpels out  have a giggle and say right, now  I gotcha! lol  no not really but it can feel like that sometimes when you have to have more than 1 op . First  they knock you out , then they  draw nice little lines all over you then they  cut into  your unresisting  body  and do whatever it is they have you there for , and you just lay there out to it  trusting them . Almost every time that trust is rewarded as these docs do brilliant jobs and save many , many lives by knowing what to do when , as  I myself know from  experience .This is in no way saying that we should  not trust the docs as they are for the  most part excellent .

Now what if , lol , and this is a big if  ,we had zips ? Doc could  just come in , knock you out , unzip  you, do what needs to done , job done !   Doc would be able to relax sooner , and not have to take so much time over the cutting and stitching , lol, what a breeze ! He could have more time to himself  to spend with family or girlfriends, or play sport or something . He would not be tied down so much as all the cutting and stitching  takes a lot of time  and even the patient  would be up and about  a lot quicker  . All you would have to do maybe is keep the zip well lubricated  so it zips and unzips really smoothly . What you would use I have no idea but  I am sure someone would come up with a good lube ….lol  shut it you people  who have minds in gutters now , not that sort of lube thank you ….sheesh …

Look at how many things we do have already that have zips in them , bags of all sizes , no not women either you mean ones …sheesh … I mean the bags you carry with you to put things in , you know like wallets  and purses and suit cases  etc. Then there are all the clothes we wear , or almost wear …sheesh some people … but even just trousers  1 of the things we wear almost constantly  they have zips , and of course there are dresses and skirts and shorts  and …and…you geddit ….zips and  more zips …all being used every day in so many ways  all very useful , making things a lot easier for us. I am pretty sure if we suddenly had no zips we would not be happy , as a lot of zips keep a lot of things hidden from public eye  ( phew thank goodness for that )  lol …

We all know I am sure some people  who should have zips for lips   lol , but no not those kind of zips either no matter how tempting it would be . some people would never be allowed to unzip them  , lol , pollies for a start with all their lies . Anyway those are not the kind of zips  I mean , the ones I mean would actually be helpful  to a lot of people , and make things a lot easier . Unfortunately  we do not come with zips , though I still think it would help a lot , we don’t  but imagine if you will just how many of the ops done that have to be done on the main part of the body  would be made that much easier if we could just be unzipped  for them . Have no idea what you do about the rest of the body  lol  but a zip in main part would sure cut down surgery time and recovery time  , and that  I am sure would be great for all . Doctors  I am afraid  you will just have to keep doing  all the work the hard way …sorry  no zips …no ..lube…no nothing new …dammit … lol..


ME:: what do you want for your birthday? HUSBAND: Not much just a radio with a sports car around it.


Unbelieveable …… Cannot believe  how long it has taken to get to this point …let’s start at the start now shall we  ?

This is the way we  chuck stuff in the box , stuff in the box.. stuff in the box……This is the way we chuck stuff in the box ..all day long ….

This is the way we  chuck it all in the truck.. all in the truck… all in the truck…this is the way we chuck it all in the truck …before we drive it away  …

Well anyway you get the idea moving house is a right royal pain in the butt as most people  know , and this is all perfectly normal and we expect it to be this way . Never known moving to go without a hitch  anytime  or anywhere  so no worries about this. What we do not expect though is trouble with our  so called ” service providers ”  and  I use the term service very loosely  as we found out after our move. How can they excuse making us wait over 7 weeks to be re connected ? How in the world can they justify this  ? Makes no sense to me on any level at all , if they are that short of staff I have 2 questions  , 1 how did they let it get like that , and 2 why haven’t they fixed it long before now ? They must know that they are going to need more staff so why not get them  ? Maybe because they are such a monopoly  and have complete power over all internet providers they have just become complacent .

Well anyway enough about them we at least now have connection  and that is good  but let me suggest if you plan to move make sure you remember  it will take weeks to get re connected no matter what , they do not care if you need it for work or not .

So anyway you get it all packed , you sort things out , you find things you forgot  you had  , you find things and wonder where on earth  did this come from ? You find multiples of things you didn’t know you had , you find things you were sure that you had lost , you find things you wish you had known you still had coz  you could have used them , and on and on it all goes . Drives you to utter distraction but you have to do it , you have to  ” suck it up buttercup ”  and just get on with it , after all it is your job  to get it done.

Now we get to the real fun bit  , it’s all been chucked in the truck and driven to the new place ..oh joy what  ?  lol …I will tell you now what , now you have to find just the right place for all your stuff that you have just moved from the right place in the other place  , now you have to find yet more right places …sheesh I’m getting dizzy now  lol …oh well someone has to do it  and  I suppose it just has to be me …oh and hubby too if he knows what’s good for him ….lol . ..after all half of all this junk is his too not just mine.

So it’s all in the new place it’s all piled in 1 room while you try to work out where to put it all again  ..and no you cannot put it in the bin coz it’s all too hard , you have to do it right  .Do it right or someone might get a tad upset with you coz you did it wrong and it’s not where you wanted it so it has to be moved ..again ..and again..and again ..till it is in it’s new right place …now repeat and repeat and repeat   ad infinitum  till finally everything is now in it’s right place . In it’s right place  till a week later you decide nope wrong place let’s move that to there ……>  or maybe to  there  <……  you know it’s true , lol it happens all the time when  we are silly enough to move so much stuff at 1 time …we are  so silly we do it all the time  don’t we when we decide it’s time to move house ? Better if we just stayed put be a lot easier on us , and a lot less stress.

So unless  it is absolutely  necessary to move I have 1 word for you  DONT! lol it is way too much of a pain to do , so do not do it !! Will have to be a huge reason to make me ever want to do this again  trust me , have done this too many times before  to want to do it again …unless of course someone will do it all for me and  I can just watch …lol  asif that would happen …oh yes and if someone else is paying for it all …lo,  yeah right ..asif…

So there you have it all done and dusted …mostly 1 more delivery to come tomorrow then it will finally all be done …and about bloody time too  …lol ..


This entry was posted on September 27, 2016. 1 Comment


Moving ….Love  it or hate it  we all do it at some point , some move more than others  some never move at all once they get to a place they decide is for them . This place is somewhere they feel warm and comfortable and relaxed in  and it will take a huge incentive  to make them go through the agonies  of packing  and moving . After all it is a huge task , sorting out , packing  boxes and cases  , playing with bubble wrap , lol, except the  sods have now stopped making it so no more  poppable  bubble wrap , new stuff is not poppable ( spoilsports ) . So a word of warning if you find real bubble wrap  then keep it , coz you will not get any more  , did  I mention they are spoilsports?  Getting rid of the poppable  stuff so they can just make more money , not fair .

Anyway getting back to this moving lark , it is no fun  it is a right pain in the proverbial , you have to go through everything you have , sort it out , see what to keep and what to chuck out. Have you any idea how time consuming and hard this is? Do I keep this or do  I not ? Will I use it again or will it just go in another cupboard  not to be used just like it wasn’t used before  , but you keep it  Justin…you know case you might want it again in 6 months time . Funny thing is if you do keep it , you will probably never use it  , but the second you get rid of it  in approximately  5 mins time you will need it . Didn’t i say a blog or 2 ago about  Murphy’s Law  ? Well this is what it is based on and remember  he was an optimist , and this  kind of situation just proves it  100%.

Then of course there is the furniture , yikes!  beds , cupboards, wardrobes , dressing tables , tables , lounges, chairs , etc . etc. etc. Then we have the  ” white goods  ”  you know fridge , freezer, washing machine , etc. then of course there is also the crockery , the cutlery, the glassware , all this stuff ad infinitum , always seems to be 1 more thing of each than you thought you had   , and you always find things you thought you had lost which add to the number of items  you now have to move . Remember  Murphy ?? lol yep here he is again messing with all your carefully laid moving plans , good ain’t it  ? lol

Clothing  now here is the really fun part , it always seems to work out that you have way more than you even thought you had , but you don’t find this out  till you start to pack them , lol , well done Murphy  once again. , but shhh don’t remind him about shoes  which always seem to have bred  in the cupboard  you had them in while you were not paying attention  so again more than you thought you had to pack  , grrrr  dam  you Murphy ..see how he manages to mess with every thing ?  Mess with every plan you had and were so sure you had sorted . lol not a hope of it all going exactly to plan with him around . Will someone please get rid of  Murphy and his law please  ?

Things  will not be so bad if you remember him and plan around him , yes it can be done  , lol, if you like call it a plan B , always have a plan B , I always have and it has always worked for me  ( phew ) lol ….so right now sitting among the cases and boxes and  bubble wrap , yes the right kind lol  and I’m keeping what we don’t use  so I can still have some popping fun later .  Waiting on hubby to get last few things done  and for the truck to arrive  to pick up the stuff , hoping that  when it all gets to the other end it will all come off  ok and then we can begin the fun of sorting it out …oh joy ..😦  …lol … got to be done right  ?  The very best thing about this bit is that once we have gotten it all there  we can take our time to sort it out and get rid of what we don’t want .

Then for the next few weeks  you sort things out  , get the house in order , then go out and about in your new suburb  to see what’s what  so you know where everything  is if you need anything , this can be a nice relaxing time walking around  and maybe meeting new people  in the shops  or whatever and maybe some of the new neighbours . First few weeks are the most intense as you get to know the place and the people and how things work , like busses and trains etc. …..Anyway   better get going  before hubby and or truck arrives  lol will see you all later ….🙂

Husband”hunny, I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear” . . . Me “kitchen, living room, dining room, bed room, should I keep going?” . . .

Terms and Conditions

Terms and conditions  or otherwise known as  t’s & c’s ….. These things drive us so mad at times they are attached  to  everything we do , say or buy , and then some   and you can bet your sweet bippy  they will soon be on every single thing   we do , say etc. Buy anything  anywhere  anytime and yep you guessed it t’s and c’s  are on them  and if you  do not sit down for half an hour  and read every single 1 of them it can come to bite  you in the bum , almost literally  , so you better  take  the time to read , make sure  you have your glasses on too. Think how awful you will feel if you get bit on the bum coz  you missed a bit  , coz  you forgot to have your glasses on , silly you  ….

They  put them on everything  but you know I think they just do that to make your life  miserable  lol they know that 9 out of 10 people will not even bother to read them so if and when something goes wrong with whatever it is they have you by the short and curlies  and there is nothing you can do about it  coz you didn’t  bother to read all the t’s & c,s  right  down to the bottom  , with your glasses on so you did not miss  a thing . Yes , yes I know it is a right royal pain  to waste the time to do it but boy oh boy you are in deep shit if  you are too lazy or rushed to read them , so don’t go crying into your pillow  if you get bit  , lol, coz  I did  warn you  . I know laziness is no good unless it is well carried out  but this 1 time you better not be lazy . Don’t say  you were not warned .

So who  had a nightmare and thought up this bane of our lives ? What idiot thought up this way to torment anyone or  everyone  ? Was he just someone who was having a very bad day so decided to make us all suffer too  ? Would  love to meet him boy would  I give him a dose of his t’s & c’s  back . There is nothing worse than having something  break down and when you try to  return it or get your money back ? lol You know it  , you didn’t read those dam t’s & c’s  so you get nothing . You can bet your life  right down the bottom  in a small  paragraph  is the bit you didn’t see coz you didn’t bother to read them or you missed it coz you forgot your glasses , see? it’s always your fault , never the fault of the ones who made them up  to get you with . When it comes to these you can bet  you got only a 1 in a million chance of actually getting your thing  replaced or a refund.

They get you so tied up in knots you have no idea what to do or where to go and most of the time it is a waste of time anyway , they win you lose  it’s the way they have it set up . So unless you want to get bit , start reading  !!  lol . I know if  I ever buy anything I will make hubby read em  , lol, I cant be bothered  so he can cover my bum , isn’t that what hubby’s  are for anyway  ? * snigger * So anyway …. You  lot need to learn to read all the fine print on everything always these days or you too can have the pleasure of being bit on the bum , so unless you like being bit on the bum   as  I just said  start reading !!  They have got us all  right where they want us  and  as usual it is all up to us to protect  our own bums .

I think I  am going to put those same  t’s&c’s on my bum from now on it is getting way too hard to survive these days  if you do not . Now let’s see  …where to start ??  Maybe  on if I do the  washing or not  ? or if  I cook dinner or not  ? if  I clean the house or not  ?? lol then there is the big 1 …to sex or not to sex ??  * falls over laughing *  Anyway  you can see what I mean it seems to me  that it will not be long  before we do have to add t’s&c’s  on our own  bums  to protect ourselves * slaps sticker on her own bum *  there that fixes  that …

Just for the record: My “give a damn” is busted. However, my “don’t annoy me or else” is fully functional. Any questions??

This entry was posted on July 27, 2016. 1 Comment


Laws … Have you ever stopped and counted up just how many laws there are  ? How many we have to live by and how many others that affect our lives ?  If you sit and think about just how many there are and how many we live by , try counting them all  lol and  I will almost guarantee  you will  get a headache . There  are so many  and  they are so varied and they cover so many parts of our lives  it does cause your head to spin if you  think too long on this subject . Makes me wonder just who started all these  and how they got them into our lives so well  , so well that we use them every day without  even thinking  about them and we do not even realise we are doing so  scary huh ? In a min  I will tell you just some of the ones I thought of in just a few mins  that will give you a clue  and also  make you see how easy it is to use them and not even notice it . Having said that let me say this  if for some reason  we don’t use  some of them it could get very very messy for us …

So where do we start ? Law of the land , law of the courts , law of relativity , law of science , law of space time , law of physics , law of marriage ( yeah dammit lol they make you keep these  if you for a husband or wife ) law of peace , law of war , law of medicine , law of gravity , law of the internet , there is 1 more but I will get to this in a minute , but there are enough there to give you a rough idea how many  laws we live by , and how many do affect  our lives in so many ways . Just try not using some of these laws and see how far you get  , as  I said it could get very messy if you try to live without 1 of the most important  laws i.e. gravity  , lol, what  can you even do without this law  ? Apart from falling on your face all the time  or  not even being able to get it up …errrm get up I mean  gravity surrounds us all and we all use it , have fun trying to live without it  , doubt you will get far it’s 1 of those things you tell people do not try this at home  .

Also we see daily  what happens when people do  not live by another very important law as in the law of the land , they cause so much damage to people and things it is heartbreaking  all because they live by a rule so evil all they want is you as a slave and everything you have or just everything  you have and will kill without compunction. We might not like the laws of the land but basically they are there to protect you and keep you safe  , true they  don’t always work  but mostly they do and it’s better to have some than none  and we can improve them  given time. The law of the court also sadly do not always work the right way but again  they do help and can be improved  with time  and quite often are . There is also law of physics  can you imagine what trouble you could get yourself into if you mess about  with this  ? Unless you are a person who knows physics  this is another way to get very messed up if you don’t know what you are doing  .

Now what about the other law I talked about huh ? This law is by far the most  annoying the most frustrating law ever but seems to affect everyone and everything  sometimes  much to our total disgust . What is this  law that drives people to drink ? drives them to want to punch someone ?  lol think for a minute …… got it yet  ??? Nope?

Murphy’s Law of course  !! Sheesh  did you think i forgot this 1  ? Not a chance  as it causes the most trouble  for you who don’t remember this law it   is this  ……..

Whatever can go wrong will go wrong  !! How many times  does this happen in our lives ? Lots and lots  let me tell you  , also let me tell you 1 more thing about Murphy …He was an Optimist !! … lol trust me there are times when  this is so true  it makes you so mad  you just want to hit something , and no not your hubby you’re not allowed to  * mutter *grumble* lol oh well maybe next time , but by now you see how many laws do  run our lives even if we don’t know it or want it we can do nothing about it  , so as they say suck it up and get on with it …… lol

I may look calm, but in my head I´ve punched you in the face 3 times already!